The New abNormal

It occurs to me that I'm not quite the hothead I used to be when I was younger - but this is by no means intended to suggest that I'm all flowers and love poetry, either.

The past week has been fun in that we've had family here - lots of family, in fact - and good food, good conversation, all manner of good times. So maybe it caused me to let down my guard.

Yesterday, we went to the Pacific Science Museum. It's to a large degree directed at children - most of the exhibits, etc are set up with a child's perspective, designed to both explain and delight children of all ages. Also, however, they are currently showing a limited engagement of the Lucy fossils - the oldest currently established fossil record of upright mankind. The exhibit shows a lot about Ethiopia's history, fossil history, and then "Lucy" herself - both a "display" version of her fossils, the actual fossils themselves, and a suggested version at how she might have actually looked.

Jillie had a lot of questions, understandably, and we did - I think - a fair job of answering them, in our usual way of presenting both the facts and the theories and often including our thoughts on them - - - but always in the context of "this is what Mom and Dad believe, what do you think?"

So she asked why the figure of Lucy looked more like an ape on two legs than a human, and I explained that because the angle from the base of the skull to the eye ridge, scientists believed she walked upright, and Lizz added that a lot of people believe that we evolved from apes, and so on.

While we were in that room with Lucy, looking at the diorama of evolution, some woman walks up and asks Lizz, "Did I hear you correctly when you said that 'some people believe in evolution'?"

Lizz was surprised by the question, and the woman repeated it.

Now, here's the deal. If you want to ever piss me off, then here's the best way to do it: imply that I'm a bad father. Suggest that my wife is a bad mother. Go on. Do it. But be ready for hell.

So I turned and saw that Lizz wasn't really sure how to respond to this surprisingly insane lady - we'll just call her The Crazy for short - so I stepped in.

"Yes, that's exactly what she said, some people do believe in evolution."

The Crazy: "So you think it's all right to tell your child that evolution is just something that some people believe in?"

Me: "We believe in telling our child the facts. And the fact is that some people believe in evolution. We tell our child all the facts and encourage her to make up her own mind."

The entire exchange lasted only a few moments, but I distinctly remember that I led Jillie away from the Crazy as quickly as possible. I wanted to smack that lady across the mouth.

The funny thing is that I do, to a certain degree, believe in evolution. I also believe in God. and I also believe that YOU DO NOT WALK UP TO A COMPLETE STRANGER AND CRITICIZE THEIR PARENTING.

I've thought about the entire exchange several times, and it's probably evolved somewhat in my replaying of it. I wish I'd done a few things differently, like maybe just say "hey, I don't really remember asking you your opinion" or "wow, honestly, if you'd like to donate a batch of your crazy, they have those cool plexiglass containers at the exits", or even "seriously, I'm not really concerned whether you believe in God, Darwin or Ronald McDonald, but please allow us to enjoy our own company."

Maybe I should've just asked her what she believed and - regardless of what she said - thanked her and left.

What's really interesting is that if I'd been there on my own, we probably would've had a really funny conversation - and my entire blog today would've likely had nothing at all to do with her.

See, she probably approached with the assumption that we're Creationists or something - which we aren't - and thought she was defending her own beliefs by standing up to some sort of religious zealots who were telling their seven year old child IN THE MIDDLE OF AN EXHIBIT ABOUT THE EARLIEST FOSSIL RECORD OF ANCIENT MAN that some people in the world believe we descended from the same genetic stock as modern apes.

Perhaps she thought she was being bold by voicing the struggling opinion of the oppressed Evolutionists, or something. I don't know, and I honestly don't care. The fact is, if she'd really listened to our prolonged conversation with Jillie, she'd have heard how we balanced all the details about religions in Ethiopia, the cultural melting pot the implied origins of the world's culture has generated, as well as all our varied conversations throughout the science museum about this scientific principle or that one.

Did she really think we'd simply come to a science museum and the Lucy exhibit to point and laugh at "those silly Darwinists" ?

Honestly, if I wanted to make fun of anyone, it'd be the people who sincerely believe so strenously in their own myopic interpretation of the world that they shut out the possibility that anyone else could possibly believe as strenously in something else.

Face facts, Ms Crazypants, some 500 years ago, our so called Fact Checkers were insisting that the world was flat as a pancake. You really want to just assume they're not wrong? You can't really afford to place your faith so completely in one basket. Well, fine, it's your choice if you want to do that. But for me and my family? We're going to continue to look at all the ideas out there and figure out which ones we're going to rely on.

And, meanwhile - since it's not nearly as important to decide whether Apes or Adam were so far back in our collective family trees as much as it is to just struggle to figure out the best way to be a Good Person - why don't you get your own misguided sense of "Fighting the Good Fight" out of the "Sticking my Nose where it couldn't POSSIBLY belong" and into a less self-righteous methodology - -  like maybe a sense of "Figuring out when something isn't even remotely any of my GODDAMNED BUSINESS" ?

* deep breath *

Okay. Time to work, now. Lots of email. But I needed to get that out of my system.